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Here you will find a record of all things fiction and the thoughts generated through clear lenses. All posts older than 12/16/2013 are works of thirst-quenching fiction you should explore freely, while everything onwards becomes what has struck the bell in my brain and turned into words. Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

NEWS: Former Virginia Governor and Wife Accept 140,805.46 in "Gifts." This is What They Should Have Got Instead!

NEWS: Former Virginia Governor and Wife Accept S140,805.46 in "Gifts"
Subheadline: Grroossss.




Pictured Above: Rich Assholes.


==Read on to the bottom to see how I would have got with 140k in bribery!

Even America is no stranger to corruption. Recently compiled data shows that it is lower here than in other countries, because openly accepting bribery isn't a posh thing to flaunt. In nations with higher rates of corruption, like India and Mexico, you may need to bribe low-ranking public officials just to receive basic state services in a timely manner. There are still deals here in the States behind back doors, both legally and illegally, that link the corporate business world to the political sphere.

This recent case is more extreme than a few slipped bills, and will hopefully bring some focus to how business and politicians play the game of getting rich and staying in power while the needs of the people the serve are ignored.

The former governor and his rich-ass wife though... this is just... boring. They accepted bribes from a wealthy businessman's political leaning in the form of, just, stuff. Dresses, shoes, purses, and a bunch of golf gear. It is *difficult* to spend that much money on things. These were just trifles with name brands, and makes me despise the pointlessness of the brand market even more, as buying anything from "top" brands is nothing more than some sort of masturbatory ritual for the super rich.

And these were some boring rich people.

IF IT WAS ME, and I was eventually going to be indicted over getting free stuff, I would have done *way better* with my wishlist.


First off,
+BALL PIT: 20'x20'. I'm going to need, say, 30,000 balls. Oh yeah!
...dang, that's only $4,300. Still got $135,700 or so left...

+LIFE TIME SUPPLY OF NUTELLA: That's about 1,000 jars of the stuff = $5,250
...haven't even broke below 130k (*are you kidding me!?*)

+ZORB BALL TEAM SUITS: Ten "Zorbs" = $15,000

+LEVITATING HOVER SCOOTER: Built by Hammacher Schlemmer, maker of Roombas = $17,000

+JETPACK: $20,000 for a high-functioning model, when hovering everywhere gets to be somewhat of a snooze.

+A FREAKING TANK: Fully-armored, no ammunition, working order: $60,000 with your International Tank Driver's license.

+A SWAROVSKI CRYSTAL ENCRUSTED HELLO KITTY FIGURE: To put on the dashboard of the tank = $8,000

I still have about $7,000 left over...
42,000 FEET OF BUBBLEWRAP: Est. $6,800~

And that's STILL enough money to go to an elementary school and buy a donut for every kid there.....


LET'S REVIEW: I now own a 400'sq. ball pit, a lifetime supply of Nutella, a full team of Zorb! suits, a levitating hover scooter, a jetpack, a FREAKING TANK, crystal Hello Kitty, about 8 miles of bubblewrap, AND I STILL bought donuts for children, making me better than these two people.

IN SUMMARY: *Fuck these guys*, if you're going to be corrupt and takes lots of money, at least make it exciting.

Wednesday, January 8, 2014

THE BEST 58 ROCK SONGS


THE BEST 58 ROCK SONGS

an entirely biased list of resonant personal favorites
from the alternative and Japanese rock scenes*
by Brent Danley Jones

      I've been working on a project where I compile the rock music that for me stands out as "best" from style to sound, energy to feeling to nostalgic feelings of lust and loss. I encourage you to start to write a list of your own, for whatever musical taste you have, as an expression of what music means to you.

  ロックミュージックしか聞けない僕はTOP58リストを書きました。
       One of the few areas I'll ever express strong opinion with little compromise comes from my preferences in music, particularly rock. This list is not documenting the pinnacle of all musical creation, nor is it saying songs outside the list aren't worthy. Through many years of killing my ear drums, these are the songs--for me--that have swayed my taste ideals in rock music, creating memorable lyrics and music I'll never grow tired of hearing. This symposium of songs pulls from my two heaviest influences: the 90's alternative rock scene and its logical derivatives, and the Japanese rock scene--the two of which are very closely tied in style and sound. I could have these 57 on repeat without skipping and drive for nine days straight.

*they are _mostly_ rock songs, in that two are dance-techno driven, and another is atmospheric instrumental. Find 'em and win a not-prize!

      First, the English songs, listed.
      Then, the Japanese songs, listed. 日本語の歌は、英語の後で書いてあります。
       After that is the master list split with both languages.
   Following those, there are honorable mentions of bands and albums that stand out as a unit. Lastly, a small list of recommendations, so you too can hear the best sounds, creativity, and energy that music has made.


      THE BEST, in English

 

Shimmer - Fuel

Semi-Charmed Life - Third Eye Blind

Absolutely (Story of a Girl) - Ninedays

Fearing the Weekend - The Scene East

Orange Shirt - Discovery

Look At Us - Sabrina Paris

Memory - Sugarcult

Motorcycle Drive-by - Third Eye Blind

One More Time - Daft Punk

Leaving Light - Talkdemonic

Sasafras Roots - Green Day

Only In Dreams - Weezer

Promise - Eve 6

Laundry Room - The Avett Brothers

Just Like Heaven - The Cure

More Than A Feeling - Boston

Debaser - Pixies

Feeling This - Blink 182

Banditos -The Refreshments

12:51 - The Strokes

Elevate Me Later - Pavement

Looking For A Cure - Planet Smashers

A Favor House Atlantic - Coheed & Cambria

God & Suicide - Blitzen Trapper

On the Bus Mall - The Decemberists



      THE BEST, in Japanese

 

Hikari, Saikou - amazarashi 光、再考

Made. Jyounetsu Mix - Mass of the Fermenting Dregs まで。情熱ミックス

Underground - High Voltage

Hello - Supercar

Yoake no Uta - Eastern Youth 夜明けの歌

Love Song - Sambomaster ラッブソング

99.974‪℃‬ - Tricot

Jack Nicolson - Bloodthirsty Butchers

Kore Kurai de Utau - Handsome Kenya これくらいで歌う

Hybrid Rainbow - The Pillows

Boku no Suki na Kimi he - Sambomaster 僕の好きな君へ

Koyoi no Tsuki no You ni - Elephant-kashimashi 今宵の月のように

Ride on Shooting Star - The Pillows

Ai toka Yume toka Koi toka Sex toka - samezame 愛とか夢とか恋とかSEXとか

Planet Magic - N'Shukagawa Boys

Melodic Storm - Straightener

Runner - High Voltage

Kage no Hito - The Mass Missile かげの人

Skeleton Liar - The Pillows

Niji - Ellegarden 虹

Chii sa na Koi no Uta - Mongol800 小さな恋の歌

Squall - Mongol800

Thank You My Twilight - The Pillows

Kono Mama Jya, Kono Mama De - The Mass Missile このままじゃ、このままで

Shirushi - Mr. Children しるし

NO - Negoto

Funny Bunny - The Pillows

She, Her - Noodles

Migite - Ellegarden 右手

Tsumasaki - Oreskaband 爪先

Morninglow - Heavenstamp

Scarecrow - The Pillows

Condom wo Tsukenai Kono Yuki wo Aishite yo - samezame コンドームをつけないこの勇気を愛してよ

Hey Lucifer - Smelly Sox




      THE BEST 58, of Music All-together, Ranked



BEST SONGS EVER (English & Japanese)

1 Shimmer - Fuel

2 Hikari, Saikou - amazarashi

3 Made. Jyounetsu Mix - Mass of the Fermenting Dregs

4 Semi-charmed Life - Third Eye Blind

5 Absolutely (Story of a Girl) - Ninedays

6 Underground - High Voltage

7 Hello - Supercar

8 Yoake no Uta - Eastern Youth

9 Fearing the Weekend - The Scene East

10 Love Song - Sambomaster

11 Orange Shirt - Discovery

12 99.974‪℃‬ - Tricot

13 Look At Us - Sabrina Paris

14 Jack Nicolson - Bloodthirsty Butchers

15 Memory - Sugar Cult

16 Motorcycle Drive-by - Third Eye Blind

17 Kore kurai de Utau - Handsome Kenya

18 One More Time - Daft Punk

19 Hybrid Rainbow - The Pillows

20 Boku no Suki na Kimi he - Sambomaster

21 Leaving Light - Talkdemonic

22 Koyoi no Tsuki no you ni - Elephant-kashimashi

23 Sasafras Roots - Greenday

24 Only In Dreams- Weezer

25 Ride On Shooting Star - The Pillows

26 Promise - Eve 6

27 Laundry Room - The Avett Brothers

28 Just Like Heaven - The Cure

29 Ai toka Yume toka Koi toka Sex toka - samezame

30 Planet Magic - N'Shukugawa Boys

31 Melodic Storm - Straightener

32 Runner - High Voltage

33 Kage no Hito - The Mass Missile

34 Skeleton Liar - The Pillows

35 Debaser - Pixies

36 Niji - Ellegarden

37 More Than a Feeling - Boston

38 Feeling This - Blink 182

39 Chii sa na Koi no Uta - Mongol800

40 Squall - Mongol800

41 Thank You My Twilight - The Pillows

42 Banditos -The Refreshments

43 12:51 - The Strokes

44 Elevate Me Later - Pavement

45 Looking For A Cure - Planet Smashers

46 A Favor House Atlantic - Coheed & Cambria

47 Shirushi - Mr. Children

48 NO - Negoto

49 Funny Bunny - The Pillows

50 She, Her - Noodles

51 Migite - Ellegarden

52 Tsumasaki - Oreskaband

53 Morninglow - Heavenstamp

54 God & Suicide - Blitzen Trapper

55 Scarecrow - The Pillows

56 On the Bus Mall - The Decemberists

57 Condom wo Tsukenai - samezame

58 Hey Lucifer - Smelly Sox

Honorable Bands

Envy - The Japanese Post-rock kings of pain, fury, and elation. No stronger performing group I've ever seen. Listening to their songs is not enough, but a night spent with Envy on stage will never be forgotten.

Explosions in the Sky - Not one song can define this expansive instrumental tour in melodic beauty and powerful energy out of West Texas.

Foo Fighters - The most defining rock group. At the middle of rock and all its formations, Foo Fighters forms the base and center of what I consider to be the purest form of solid rock.

The Offspring - The band responsible for blending pop, rock, and harder sensibilities into one of the most successful, listenable brands of rock still very unique to the group. A true titan of music.

Green Day - The most formative group for me, the first I *cassette* I ever owned. Even though the years brought change, so much music started from these three guys singing coyly about the life in front of their blurry eyes.

The Barenaked Ladies - The first band I ever considered myself a fan of. The right mix of musical sensibilities and light-hearted good spirit.


Honorable Albums

Welcome Joy - Cave Singers
Hot Fuss - The Killers
LP - Discovery
Self-titled - American Football
All Day - Girl Talk
Endless Fantasy - Anamanaguchi


You Need to Hear This: A Mini Playlist to Take Home
 
Fearing the Weekend - The Scene East
Jack Nicolson - Bloodthirsty Butchers (esp. video on youtube)
Kore Kurai de Utau - Handsome Kenya (esp. video on youtube)
Hikari, Saikou - amazarashi
Orange Shirt - Dsicovery
Absolutely (Story of a Girl) - Ninedays
Laundry Room - Avett Brothers
Looking For A Cure - The Planet Smashers
99.974‪℃‬ - Tricot  (esp. video on youtube)
All Day - Girl Talk (Album)